okay, this is the area where we really get down to some creative business. Actually, what I mean is that if I can polish up some notes and publish them here, I can feel vindicated for having wisely held onto those few pieces of paper, which in a way justifies maintaining (as a cohesive entity) the pile of papers in which they have been residing for Godonlyknowshowlong, and which, following this logic, rationalizes my accumulation of the aforementioned pile's numerous pilemates, which are spread liberally all over my apartment. Piles of Words.

Reports from the Farm

The following news items, for one reason or another, were not included in (careful: link to graphic-laced pages) Mo Speeks.

1) The Rendering Industry Promeatiators (RIP), a nutritional think tank, vows to convince consumers that, in fact, "hamburgers are safe enough for cows to eat."

2) A random sampling of cows surveyed objected to the news that rendered protein (meat, bone, etc.) was being mixed in their feed, until advised that it contained very little actual rendered cow. However, the survey did uncover among more urbane bovines wide acceptance of the notion that you "become what you eat"and these respondants did express disapproval of some of the ingredients in rendered protein. They considered sheep (57% of volume) wimpy; pigs (12%) dirty and "stuck up;" chickens (11%) brainless; roadkill (4%) immoral and shiftless. Most did not want to know what constituted the ingredients remaining 12%.

3) No cow has ever been found culpable for the reputed disappearances of any small farm animal, dog, cat, child, farmers wife, or diminutive farmer. Evidence has, however, been unearthed that some farmers have simply been away attending the many popular Agricultural Militia Bomb School seminars now being offered in the midwest.

4) No individual connected to this website has any objection whatsoever to feeding animals designed by nature to be vegetarians, rendered protein, dead meat, chemicals, or any other stuff that meat industry experts say is OK. Also, we have no objections to the Food Disparagement laws being enacted throughout this grand land. These swell new laws should put an end to malcontents saying bad things about meat. Protecting our meat supply was, after all, one of the motivating forces behind the creation of our Constitution.